As Allah tells us in the Quran:
"Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother?
No, you would hate it." (Ch49: v12)
But What If It's True?!
The Prophet (saw) told us "Backbiting is to say something
about someone they wouldn't like said about them....If what bad you said
about them is true, then you have backbited and if it is false then you
have slandered them."
If you're still not convinced of how big a sin backbiting
really is, then look at the punishment Allah has in store for the backbiters.
The Prophet (saw) described: "On the night of Mirage I passed by some
people who had metal hooks in their hands and were clawing at their faces
and their necks with them. I asked Gabriel 'Who were these people?' He
said 'These are the people who eat the flesh of human beings and disgrace
them'.
This is how big of a sin backbiting is looked upon and yet
we continue to backbite without a second thought, next time you lie, talk
about somebody, remember Allah (swt) and the Prophet (saw) and put them
in front of you before you speak.
Just having a Laugh!
Maybe we think it's all right to take the mock out of someone
so long as we say it to their face. 'We'll make fun of the way someone
talks, walks, or how they look. Allah warns us against such behaviour:
"O you who believe. Let not some men laugh at others, it may be the that
they are better than you. Nor let some women laugh at others it may be
that they are better than you. Nor abuse each other , nor be sarcastic
to each other by using offensive nicknames..." (Ch49v11)
Don't forget that Allah made us the way we are, so how can
you even think of making fun of his creation?
Cool to Swear?
Listen to yourself and to your friends speaking one day
- nearly every sentence will have a swear word in it, thinking it's cool
and macho to swear, copying the idols of TV and the cinema. Is it really
'cool' to swear? The Hellfire is far from being cool. People will wish
they were cool then rather than being cool in this world. Remember! That
every time you speak , an angel writes down what you say, and that one
day you will have to answer for every single word you ever uttered. So
if you swear at someone then it's written down as a sin against you. You're
only harming yourself. The Prophet (saw) said that "Abusing a Muslim is
a sin and fighting with him is disbelief." (MUSLIM).
'But sometimes you just have to swear'!
We've all been there - you're just so angry with somebody
and the only way you can express yourself, is to swear at them. The solution?
...
Don't get angry in the first place.
A man came to the Prophet (saw) one day and said "Advise
me". The prophet (saw) said "Don't become angry. Don't become angry. Don't
become angry".... "When one of you gets angry while he is standing up,
he should sit down. Then anger will leave him, and if not then he should
lie down" (Ahmad). So let us follow this beautiful advice of the Prophet
(saw) and remember that anger is from shaitan. If someone angers you or
swears at you then don't harm yourself by doing the same but respond in
a better way as Allah says in the Quran:
"Repel evil with what is better. Then he who was your
worst enemy will become your best friend." (Ch41v33)
"It wasn't me. Honest."
How often do we say such a phrase or say that "I was only
joking". We treat lies as being trivial. However we are told that "Allah's
messenger did not hate anything more than lying"(Ahmed). The Prophet (saw)
was once asked "Can a Muslim be a coward?" He (saw) replied "Yes." and
then asked "Can a Muslim be a miser?" and the reply was "Yes." The Prophet
(saw) was then asked "Can a Muslim be a liar?" The Prophet (saw) replied
"NO! A Muslim can never be a liar". Furthermore, he said "Truth leads
to virtue and virtue leads to paradise...Lying leads to wickedness and
wickedness leads to the hellfire." (Bukhari). As we know that one lie
leads to another ten lies which lead to bad actions. Remember you can
lie and think that you have got away with it but on the day of Judgement
your hands, tongue and feet will bear testimony against you and tell the
truth.
But it's only words!
One day one of the companions asked the Prophet (saw)
"O Messenger of Allah. Will we be called to account for what we say?"
He replied "May you be lost to your mother - people will be thrown, faces
down into the hellfire, only on account to what their tongues said." (Tirmidhi).
Indeed the tongue controls the rest of your body. A well
controlled tongue will keep us within Islam but a loose tongue will destroy
us.
The Prophet (saw) said "When a person gets up in the
morning, all the parts of his body make a plea to his tongue saying; 'Fear
Allah regarding us, because we follow you. If you are right then we shall
also be right , and if you are wrong then we shall also be wrong." (Tirmidhi)
Instead of swearing, lying and engaging in useless talk
we can use our tongues in better ways and what better than telling people
about Islam. Allah says "Who is better in speech than one who calls
(men) to Allah and works righteousness and says I am one of those who
bow down in Islam" (Ch 41v33)
Your tongue can save you as well!
Indeed if you control your tongue and speak good then paradise
can be yours. The Prophet (saw) said "Whoever can guarantee me two
things I can guarantee them Paradise." The companions asked "What
O Messenger of Allah?" He replied "What is between his jaws (his
tongue) and his legs (private parts)." (Bukhari)
I've lied and backbited, sworn and made fun of others. I
must be doomed I must be going to hell!"
NO! Allah (swt) tells us in the Quran:
"O my servants who have wronged themselves. never despair
of the mercy of Allah for truly he forgives all sins. He is the Forgiving,
the Merciful." (Ch39v53)
So if you really repent and turn back to Allah and promise not to
commit the sin again then truly Allah's promise is true and He will forgive
you. If you've backbitten someone - go and tell the person whom you backbited
and apologise sincerely and ask them to forgive you. But if you think
that the situation will get worse then turn back to Allah sincerely begging
for his forgiveness then to make up for what you said, go around and talk
good of him.
The Best Example
As we know that the best person to have ever lived is the
Prophet Muhammad (saw) and he is the best of example for mankind. If we
follow him we can never go wrong. Ayesha (RA) the Prophet's wife described
the Prophets conduct as follows:
"He was neither a obscene talker nor a user of bad words. He did
not shout nor did he repay evil with evil. He used to forgive people and
overlook their sins." (Tirmidhi)
Final Advice: A beautiful saying of the Prophet (saw) that will ensure
the protection of our tongue. The Messenger of Allah (saw) said:
"Whoever believes in Allah and the Last day, LET HIM
EITHER SPEAK GOOD OR KEEP SILENT" (Agreed upon)
